Friday, April 24, 2009

Welcome to The Confessional

Hi. Welcome to Peter's Confessional. This blog will provide you with an intriguing insight into the private life and experiences of one sir Peter [of the] Jackson.

The autobiographical series "Confessions..." has been underway for years now. With the advent of the internet blog, I find it only appropriate to abandon my dream of becoming a member of Oprah's Book Club and traveling the world on a book-signing tour. Rather, I will follow suit and reach across my fan base in the cyberworld, starting with the first volume of the series, Confessions of a Fat Bitch.

My vision for Confessions of a Fat Bitch is that I will reach out to fatasses across this nation and beyond. In a world polluted with diet books, vegan restaurants, Nutrisystem and uncracked scales, it is about time someone came out and reminded humanity that we were all born with the capacity to eat. Everybody gets hungry. Everyone has one time or another single-handedly gone through a tub of Tollhouse chocolate-chip cookie dough in one sitting. We are ALL in this together.

Wouldn't it be a better world if FAT was the ideal body type? With skinny people binging at McDonalds trying to catch up, skipping past the gym to the local Dairy Queen, and fatties shamelessly lounging on the beach in bikinis hidden in crevasses by rolls and overflowing muffin tops?

I wait for the day. However, unfortunately society is still jaded. And the fatties continue to lurk (and eat) in the shadows... bitter and afraid. I must speak out. Our voice will be heard. This is my story: Confessions of a Fat Bitch.

Experiencing it all so you don't have to,
Peter of the Jackson
CEO of The Confessional